chick flicks and taylor swift songs are like porn for desperate singles
Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
Just spit on a sock to clean a spot on my glass table. Oddest combination of so lazy and motivated ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just because your phone has a case on it doesn't mean it will survive a 5 story drop out the window.
My dora the explorer band aid does not cover up the shame i feel right now
Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
I had a dream about a turtle sitting on top of a horse skull. I'm certain its a symbol for my dead sex life. Trust me.
She thinks she's a fairy, dude. A real fucking fairy with wings and shit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
He dared me to drink a bottle of olive oil in exchange for a 30 pack... So much for loosing the freshman fifteen this year.
My stomach literally has no contents left. Tequila cleanse=success.
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
hypothetically, what's the best method to remove an stray semen gob from a roommate's important school document?
Randomize