we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
I gambled and lost. Had to pull into a funeral home to clean up with a copy of my resume.
You can't like Harry Potter and Twilight. You have to pick. Vampires and Wizards are mutually exclusive.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Have you ever chased with pilaf before? Because dont.
Your penis has nothing to do with my throat infection, sorry...
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
Dude. Stop sending me lines from Hungry Like the Wolf
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A stripper just invited me to her daughter's birthday. Where did my life go wrong?
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
I'm pretty sure the Bible says "He who is most sober may cast the first stone."
I tried to text you about going to the Lion's Den but sent it to my boss. She was down for it. Please advise.
Here’s how sick I am. I’m not hungry. I don’t want coffee. And I don’t want dick. So, you know it’s bad.
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
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