If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
when your english prof writes "this was a real good paper" on your essay, you know you're at the wrong college
Your remote is drenched in lotion and you expect me to believe you weren't masturbating?!
I'm in the liquor aisle and a 10 yr old boy yells, "My favorite beer is Corona! Daddy remember when you gave me some on our camping trip?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The carpet cleaning people refuse to steam clean human feces. I'll call back later and blame it on the dog not you
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
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Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
The trees feel like magic. Come fly to taco bell with me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I would totally lead with that as a line.'So, I was on Legends of the Hidden temple as a kid.. Your place or mine?'
They gave me patron and potatoes I couldn't say no
I've needed to start drinking protein shakes to keep up with her. It's like my dick just started doing crossfit.
Taking care of drunk people fulfills my need to be a mother
I found myself looking up beard accounts while masturbating, I guess that's what it's come to.
He ran out to tell us that somebody flooded the bathroom, then went back in there fell on his ass and asked why the floor was wet
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