It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
I am not deleting the internet history anymore, now I am going for shock value.
some random kid just walked into our apartment with two cases... I don't know who he is but I like him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Are you still at the party or did I leave?
It was like some kind of slut recycling operation. She gave me the shirt of the last guy she slept with in exchabge for mine so I didn't have to wear the same thing to work. She's been doing it for years
literally the only thing you kept saying was "i wish i had a beer keg vending machine that accepted hugs as payment" and everytime you said it you rubbed the urn her grandmother's remains were in
You thought last year was bad... a guy dressed as a clown showed up with cocaine
I guess I'm in a committed relationship. We just had shot 1 of 3 of Gardasil. I'm now dead inside.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Want to get drunk and look at an xray of my dick?
k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
Whoever was doing lines off my iPad is a dick. Also bring Gatorade, for I hunger
For Who flesh?
I'm no longer puke free since 2013 am I.
I gave myself a charlie horse masturbating this morning. I feel like that really set the tone for the day.
What use have I for dignity? It just get's in the way of the really fun stuff.
Randomize