that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
I have a video (on my shattered iphone) of a random DJ at some bar giving me a birthday shoutout and texts from random numbers talking about birthday sex. My birthday is in April... Happy birthday to me?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I didn't want to have to tell you this, violating our brother/sister code not to discuss these things but: for the love of christ stop inviting that 21 year old idiot I slept with for six months to EVERY PARTY WE THROW.
It smells like someone died in our apartment and ya'll used some random orifice of his body to smoke weed out of. Side note, how did we get a guitar?
I lost track of him after he threw the handful of pennies at the 2 female cops and ran into the darkness. I heard a tazer and a scream. All that is left is his flip flop. Its like hes drunken man-derella.
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
The best part about passing out on the floor was the fact that when I pissed myself, I didn't piss the bed again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Logically he should not be walking around...after that fall he should be in a hospital in a medically induced coma
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
1. I'm excited for tonight 2. Do we dress up as pirates? 3. Happy Valentine's Day bae
people keep driving by and judging me for drinking natty outside in my underwear at 9 am. rude.
Wow i just puked in front of the lady that was drug testing me. I passed though!
we went to go have morning sex and I said “I was gonna put my mouth on it but you need to shower”#ruinedthemoment
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