whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
I just ate a drumstick out of the garbage. I need a life coach.
You even been so high breaking up weed with your fingers feels like surgery?
It's underwear night and I am literally in the bar wearing nothing but underwear and flip flops.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He wore homemade jorts on our first date. I'm not sure if I should leave now or embrace the white trash lust and marry him
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
Remind me if I threw up on you last night or if that was just a dream.
we found you outside the hotel room sleeping with a note next to you that said " we made sure you were comfortable, hope your friends come back soon"
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing sez sunday morning like waking up in a phonebooth with a leg cramp.
Imagine if you could have something so delicious, like your taste buds went on LSD while eating a chocolate tiramisu. That's the opposite of what cum tastes like.
I'm not about to serve this country to fuckin not have rum and cheezits for breakfast
Welcome to the difference between being FWBs (remember how we used to see who could get more lap dances a night?) and being in a relationship. Fun, huh?
The ecstacy made me so dehydrated I started licking condensation off car windows
I don't want my vagina anymore.
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