You know, as long as there were ice cream breaks, I would totally eat chips for a living.
Dude why does my asshole itch so bad?
I'll teach you how to wipe better
those are such fre$h shoes
going to ignore the use of the word "fresh" in a sentence that isnt related to produce and/or other food stuffs and especially the part where you replaced an "s" with a dollar sign
There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just ran four miles to popeye's. And back. Dedication.
You know what my problem is? I'm like a machine designed for the sole intention of removing the pants from damaged girls.
I just got my hands on some dry ice. How do you feel about coming home to a mystical wizard toilet?
And apparently I was the one that started the drunken make out session that broke the window
i was sitting in the back of a squad car completely stoned watching airplanes take off
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My life hurts
I woke up 30 minutes away from the bar, my car was at a train station, and when I got home all I got was the speechless head shake
I'm in jersey with marbles.. He's blasted about to fuck a manatee and his entire family is trying to stop it. His mother punched me in the chest for not trying hard enough
We had sex with a sexual harassment video playing in the background before his gf got there. I've hit a new low
We were sexting and i didn't know what to say, so i said i wanted to wrap him in tortillas and devour him like a burrito. then i went on by saying that i liked my burritos with a lot of cheese.
Also, asking the guy who just told you he is crippled on edibles to watch your kid is probably frowned upon by most
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
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