dude do u know what u did last night?
do i wanna know???
you totally walked in on some couple fuckin in their unlocked dorm room asking for directions to ur room...
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
I doubt were getting our security deposit back... the toilet just fell off the wall
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey he's not bad, although he did have a glass eye
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
There is someone hissing in the hallway. Not even a typo. Not pissing. Hissing. Like a large cat. Or a komodo dragon.
I know you all think its cute to drop me off in a different state when I black out, but I can't wake up in family campgrounds asking where I am. These parents are scared.
I was the oldest, shortest, and soberest at the New Years party last night. My life sucks
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His parents then knew me as the blackout who took care of him and stole his watch
We had a company shotgunning beers contest in the parking lot today, and I won. God bless America!
He said his parents were apparently coming over to surprise him with breakfast and I’ve never gotten dressed and run out of the door that quickly. I have commitment issues.
I just got through airport security with 5 grams of weed in my back pocket. Either I deserve a metal or the government is slacking
What?? I could've slept with an ordained minister!
I totally fucked your pastor last night.
You're his wife.
Still a dirty get down.
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