he pushed my hair back because he said it made me look like kelly kapowski and he told me to call him zach
I'm giving you permission to use the abortion money to pay for your DUI.
I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
The only word I understood in that whole setence was semen.
Just saying goodbye until I figure this whole "warrant out for my arrest" thing
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
This is America. Deny every slut accusation or own up to it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing says "welcome to Denver" like a hot 18 year old giving you directions to the dispensary and ending up blowing you in the backseat
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
I wanted to say "you're a souless cunt" but in a nice way. So I added a smiley face.
He showed up soaking wet with a flashlight and a ping pong ball. I couldn't say no
Well we've always known you have a weakness for guys with balls in their hands
Apparently I told him the people made me order taco bell I didn't even want it. And then proceeded to turn off all the lights and sit at the kitchen table in the dark and told him not to look at me.
death, taxes, and me drunk texting you are 3 certainties in life
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