ppl dont tell me stories about anal. apparently im not a tell-me-stories-about-anal kind of person
guess who just got paired up at the beer pong table with the fat girl who's nipples are hanging out...
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
Best. Four. Twenty. Ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a tube of mascara. Get on my level
Her inability to understand the word "moderation" is the achille's heel of an otherwise perfect human
She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high".
Trust me man, I did not put any cookies down your pants when you slept.
I don't mean to complain but you could have done a better job of keeping me alive last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had very briefly met him a few years ago. My friend was tired of hearing us both complain about being horny. She figured she would fuck two birds with one stone.
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
I just gargled with NyQuil
Did I literally just offer a blowjob for help moving? Yes. Yes, I did.
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
I never thought I'd be judging my neighbors sex lives before age 30 but here we are
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