batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
He brought over a 20 dollar bottle of wine. Who does that? This is college.
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
maybe you should do the old hyperventilate, take a shot of vodka, sniff someone's hair trick
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
I've got mace and a condom. Ready to roll either way and keeping my pimp hand strong.
The forecast for tonight is alcohol and low expectations.
You're the only meteorologist I listen to.
It was like a Thanksgiving meal, which you spend 8 hours cooking, and the family wolfs down in 20 minutes. All that flirting and build-up for like 90 seconds of pumping and he was gone in a flash, never to be heard from again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll have you know my trust issues and my daddy issues are two COMPLETELY different topics of conversation.
My dream of watching a live dick sword fight might never be realized now. Currently sobbing, shots to follow
I WOULD SERIOUSLY RECOMMEND THE SHIT THAT I AM ON RIGHT NOW
I can't believe we really went to walgreens to use their cork opener, bounced and drank a bottle of wine in a sketchy corner...
PICK ME UP NOW I THINK THIS MOTEL IS A CRIME SCENE. also congrats on your engagement i saw the post on my phone while i was climbing out the window
If you get me a sex toy for Christmas everyone in my family will question our relationship.
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