Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
i think 'regret' was last night's theme. i could taste it in my mouth and woke up next to it.
I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
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somehow we got the entire party to start singing "ill make a man out of you" from mulan. needless to say, that kid had the best keg stand i'd ever seen.
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
It was more like a tour de entire bottle of wine in 14 minutes
Psh a bachelors degree is the new adulthood. We're all just pretending anyways. I'm sitting on my boyfriends couch while he's passed out drunk. In my lap. On a Wednesday. And he's a nurse. See, pretending to be an adult
I lick assholes and I wouldn't eat mdma
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So let me get this straight I was getting drunk with our science teacher from high school and you got drunk with an 82 year old woman who invited you back to her house and made you sandwiches.
Yes.
You texted him 17 times. Asking for him back and sending random pictures of Jimmy Buffett. He didn't answer.
Somehow I went from sitting in a car upside down to waking up in the grass surounded by paramedics. It was a great night.
I am listening to Jack Johnson and wearing the sweater your Mother made me fuck mother nature I am in my happy place right now
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
St. Patty's shenanigans tmrw? I wanna meet dudes lol. Why stop at coronavirus when you can get the clap, too?
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