Vanillla milkshakes are the new Gold Bond. Will explain later.
I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
what the fuck is a social media consultant, who does she consult for, and how bad is she at it? her facebook account is currently hacked and posting ads for the ipad 2 on my newsfeed
I feel like I got hit by a truck. Or a baby dinosaur. One of them ran over my body and then stuck me in a blender of fire and storm clouds
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
Just traded a sandwich for anxiety drugs outside the club. I fuckin' LOVE this place.
A gay guy went down on me in the club bathroom and then fixed my makeup for me
its gonna be a great night
You can't say "my boobs are wonderful" and not expect my drunken subconscious to focus on wanting to see them. Btw-can I see them?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It is a bad day indeed when you learn that your boy toy looks better in your dresses than you do
Please tell me those naked pics were not your mom. Lie if you have to.
Everyone is like kids first day of school and I'm over here like I need to stop sleeping with random
I just ate cream cheese straight for my dog
I'm afraid to ask what that means
I'm having a hard time eating my sandwich knowing how many different buttholes my hands were in last night.
I didn’t eat all day. Got really drunk at a bruins game and puked in a random dunkies cup on the T
If that doesn’t scream I’m from New England, I don’t know what does
Randomize