Looks like I will be paying for the roofie I slipped myself in 9 months.
you made me "pop lock and drop it" as a sobriety test last night..
mom asked me why i'm never sober at family events, i told her i learned it from her.
Sorry I didn't wanna double team his sister. Having whiskey dick and watching you get laid didn't sound appealing
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
Im at target. Idk why I'm buying condoms AND a tutu for my cat. No one who dresses their cat up has ever gotten laid.
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
Also, just had a student offer to sell me Xanax. Want some? Just for like a rainy day. Or our memorial day shitshow. Or just another Wednesday night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Only Jon could get an entire commuter train to chant "Ride! Jon! Home!" to get a girl in bed.
his brother walked in while we were fucking on the couch, told me i had "lovely jugs" and offered to make both of us a drink
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
I think I’ve been affected by his dad mustache. I wanna ride it.
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