Why does it always sting when I'm breaking the seal taking a piss?
b/c u have herpes
No i said "always", not "since 2003" Asshole.
I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
do you remember putting condoms over both your hands and asking me if your fists would be too big.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the biggest problem in our relationship is that im team edward and my boyfriend is team jacob
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
Its really bad when you fall asleep at a stop light outside the hotel and you wake up to a small spanish limo driver knocking on your window to tell you it's a green light
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did you clean his pubes up off the table yet?
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
Chugging this bottle of Jim at the airport is proving more difficult than I imagined. TSA is not amused.
Dude I had sex with her and she STILL thinks I'm gay. I don't know what else to do.
I gave your mom a discount on her coffee, its my way to say thanks for having a son that makes me come every time
It was all going good until I realized she was wearing underwear with a butt flap. Mission aborted.
Randomize