why didn't you poke me back
Happy Easter!!!
I'm an idiot
What do you think that old couple was thinking when they saw me puking in the QT parking lot at ten in the morning?
Somebody was walking their dog with their car. seriously
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
I want nothing more to get stoned and go to your little sisters petting zoo party but I need to have priorities
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
Sending a dick pic with a 2010 time stamp on it is violation of proper sexting etiquette
I just remembered that i did pull ups in a bikini on the porch of Red Lobster last night. someone needs to stage an intervention
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His ex-girlfriend just gave his current girlfriend the heimlach omg omg omg help this is so awkward
Thanks for the Beyonce article. In other news, I just passed a man with the state of Florida tattooed on his face.
Just accidentally flashed my junk to the lady helping me try on suits, it was cold in there, I don't think she was impressed.
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
11:30 you texted me saying he was on his way. 11:37 you said, "Oh my God that was terrible."
It’s 830 am and the amount of Valentine’s Day snaps I’ve already seen makes me either want to vom, drink a bottle of wine, or buy chocolate
1000% No lie I was just looking on insta and was thinking about taking a bottle of wine to the face..
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