turns out Discover card thinks that if you spend $450 at four different liquor stores in one evening that the card "must have been stolen"
definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
I was really stoned haha. I had sex with her while I cooked scrambled eggs.
I HAVE MY OWN TITS FOR THAT AND I CAN GUARANTEE THAT THEYRE MORE GLORIOUS
There is a good chance that the other night after a wedding reception i was at that i mailed you a drink coaster.
My girl came home. i was jacking off on the couch and she just starts telling me about her day, as if im not half naked with my hand on my cock.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
so getting blacked out last night has made my lips so beautifully red for pictures today... and they say nothing good comes from alcohol
I'm going to give you the best blowjob of your life. And yes you can use my mom's printer.
I do remember that in my dream I wasn't impressed with his dick.
Imagine how different my life would be if I could find a man who gave me more pleasure than pizza at 2am when I'm drunk.
I have successfully trained your dog to bring me pudding cups!
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
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