I told her it just looked small because my balls were gigantic. She bought it.
I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
Why is there a cactus in the microwave?
Don't worry about it.
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
She literally called herself a shamefully bad decision. Of course I slept with her. Best bad decision ever
Blacked out at the beach and unblacked out at a piano bar singing Tiny Dancer.
STOP SETTING ME UP WITH GUYS YOU MEET ON CRAIGSLIST
I just used a thesaurus to write a sext...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We had a One Night Stand 6 months ago but he just Facebook invited me to his wedding. Who the fuck does that.
There are peanut butter donuts now. We are playing with forces we can't possibly understand.
But I thought it was so funny last night
You also thought you were a gypsy mermaid last night
Yea he was still drunk. He wore a Toga to his job interview.
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
Randomize