I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
Wow, being the totally hot and slutty looking 30 year old lady on the dance floor does NOT necessarily mean that she has skills in bed.
Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.
You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.
Well someones bitter they didn't get any.
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
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And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
I knew it was gonna be a rough night when the guys next to us at Relay for Life started shot gunning beers and yelling "This ones for all the hot chicks that went bald because of cancer". It kinda went downhill from there....
Bring your friend that fell asleep in the bathroom for my friend.
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
Pretty sure the shower sex fucked up my hip alignment... im walking like im 104 today
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My logic for bringing him home was, he's in law school so odds are he wouldn't kill me.
Everywhere I look there's another kitten this is so ideal
Can I live on acid? Kittens man. Kittens.
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
the wedding party just walked in to the song eye of the tiger. i'm getting drunk.
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
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