it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
he's washing the lighter in the sink and telling me to picture unicorns. requesting backup.
It's sad that my net worth at the moment is 4 beers
There was a photo of his face glued to a lifesize Kim Kardashian cutout. By the end of the night he was doing shots out of medicine cups and making everybody hug it goodbye.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If shame burned calories, I'll be back to my birth weight by the end of this weekend.
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
There's no discreet way to sneak a cucumber into the shower lol
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
I'm daydrinking whiskey in a princess hat
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
DO NOT SLAP ANYONE WITH ANY VEGAN MEAT PATTIES
pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready
It will be the shitshow of all shitshows.
The FEDEX guy just cock blocked me by getting his van stuck in my driveway
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
Now I am free. And I want to go meet men. My phone deleted all my contacts, and I consider this to be a new beginning. With a new man in my phone book.
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