Barsexuality is the new black.
I told my rommate that he was pissing on his bed. He said "ok man" and took a step backwards and continued. He then went back to bed.
alright she left, finally time to fart up the room
Just dominated the men's bathroom at work. Sounded like the intro of a death metal song.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just joined the mile high club. if this plane crashes because of this text, it was worth.
Chasing a shot of svedka with a clementine is NOT the same as tequila w lime...
Yeah I remember I tried to close her head in the freezer last night
Let me clarify that those tears were for losing my fuck buddy and his penis, not to the fact that he decided he wanted an actual relationship with feelings.
We went to IKEA super baked wearing fake mustaches. You?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
if i can hear my landlord's phone ring you think be can hear my vibrator?
Like I wasn't going to make out with the hot Australian sitting next to me at the Portland blazer game?
Its official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world
Just so you know sleeping with you is like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
That's the most romantic thing I've ever heard
We were driving past a farm when he screamed at me to stop the car, then he jumped out and tried to ride a cow.
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