road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
He tried to use a signal flare to light the bong
And?
He melted the stem
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Threw up on the baby. National Tequila Day is the eve of National I'm A Horrible Nanny Day.
So I went to daintily fall onto my bed like I was in a hotel commercial and I completely missed my matress and landed on my floor. Just thought u should know.
You should have seen the pharmacists face when I paid for my inhaler refill and a box of condoms.
I think the moment I knew you were going to black out was when I told you how many shots you had already and you were shocked and then poured another one
Dude I'm so clean right now. Like I feel insulted that I can pass a piss test.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Underoos and an IDGAF attitude: all you need to successfully win at life
(Underoos optional)
Remind me to tell you all about the topless girl on the street who attempted to taze me.
did the thing where I quickly swipe right to every girl on Tinder & matched with my sis. God I hope swiping carelessly is hereditary
I'm still amazed at how you managed to get Doritos in my damn front pocket without me noticing. I got crumbs everywhere.
Remind me to do laundry tomorrow so i have something decent to take off when i get laid.
You kept shouting about how you were the king of all bitches...and doors, for some reason.
Randomize