he is fucking friends with his exwife on facebook, but he defriends me after 3 dates? am i that crazy?
your stepbrother is rimming his martinis with coke... keeps saying "thank god its tuesday". where does funemployment end and intervention begin?
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
As far as drugs go, alcohol has all the elegance and precision of hitting yourself in the head with a hammer.
I haven't seen her in ages, how is she?
Well I woke up next to her this morning so I guess I would say she could be doing better
There was a half eaten cheeseburger on my coffee table. Guess I made it to McDonald's.
Got laid at work. Yes, AT work, why they let me run this tennis center by myself speaks to their poor judge of character.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ummm so I'm at the hospital and just heard some guy get tazed......twice.
Because everytime she talks to you she goes in her room and plays Come Sail Away on repeat. Can't take this shit anymore Jake
It was one of those "how did I get to my bed and what am I wearing" mornings.
You haven't lived until you've thrown up naked in a hotel room in Fargo while holding your breasts so they don't touch the toilet bowl.
ya well i woke up to my roommate spraying me with windex...
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
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