Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just realized I have yet to puke in your new apartment. Clearly we're doing something wrong. On my way over with Cuervo as I type.
You were pretty dunk by the time you introduced the vase as your best friend.
took adderall before wrapping presents, ended up making paper snowflakes for two hours
Also bring a pizza or no entry to my vagina OR the fort.
Cheese only
Couldn't finish, so she gave me "the tap," and I had to leave the mound early. Nothing worse than the long walk back after the manager comes out and asks for the ball.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We took your mom out drinking and we wound up winning 18 games of Flip Cup. You have amazing genetics.
Costco cheesecake and whisky. A night made in heaven
Sorry I didn't call this morning. Ended up with a decorated war veteran last night who besides finding the enemy, KNEW where the fuck my G spot was. He gets a medal in my book!
fucked him on the porch to avoid the chanting that always happens when we leave the bedroom. backfired when a group of freshman walked by and started screaming like fucking babies.
Attention, i sprayed windex on me to disguise the scent of sex and regret off my clothes from last night
Yeah well I fucked my ex on a sink last night soooo booty calls for us all
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