yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note.
Sending me a thank you card for letting you fuck my sister was completely inappropriate
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The last thing I remember was paying off her younger brother not to judge me, then puking on his shoes.
your vagina must have magic restorative powers I feel rested and powerful this morning.
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
On the shuttle bus from the Casino the driver refused to take us to the strip club so you said "let me off this bus or ill puke on you".
I feel like my vagina was just in a fistfight.
In reference to the club we were headed to our cab driver told us about the time he had sex with a woman on the dance floor there. And what do you know, they're celebrating their 22 marriage anniversary together this year! True love does exist!
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
Fruitcakes are only good for throwing at neo Nazis.
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