dude just tell them you don't wear clothes. they'll understand
Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?
I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
At this point I just want to meet a man with a job.
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No it's ok I've been talking to the girl at the Chinese restaurant about your dick for the last 20 minutes. I haven't mentioned your name but she thinks she knows you.
Just finished off half a bottle of vodka. Can't take in anymore liquids so I ate 3 spoonfuls of your powdered gatorade to fight off the hangover. Wish me luck and check me for a pulse when you get in!
I'm smoking in a kimono on the couch. Bring me gin.
I'm at my friends house alone, she's at spin class so I'm wearing her engagement ring and eating buffalo wings. It's 9:30am. Happy Valentine's Day.
He suck his junk in my HALF BAKED. Ben & Jerry would totally disapprove. This is worse than sticky dick donut day.
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
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