you're like a bully in the Christmas story
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
Scott woke me up by cracking a beer open in my face. Best friends are awesome.
Last night you were talking while puking saying, "ahh the shoes and the purse, I'm gonna have to wash those"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Step 1: drink. 2: drink more. 3: go for it. 4a: success. 4b: drink more. 5. drink. 6. go for other girls. 7. drink more. Sound good?
As if right now I am a humanitarian. Full story to come in the morning. It involves sex.
If you want me to retract my crazy cat lady comments pictures of yourself dressed as a cat are not the way to do it.
i'm almost positive she was a dude but like it doesn't even matter
re read what you just said
I really thought I'd be the only alcoholic drinking alone in my car at noon in the Lowe's parking lot. Passed out dude in the car next to me begs to differ.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drove by a guy getting road head, midday on O Street. That could be us, but you won't let me in your pants when you drive.
I just wrote the Drag Queen from Saturday Night on FB and apologized for licking her. Weirdest thing I have ever typed...
I just took a service station dump so foul I had to buy gas out of guilt
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
I came back from England with a face tattoo and the only thing anyone can talk about is my beard.
Truth be told it's significantly easier to get over someone when they file a police report on you
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