I wish I only lived at night.
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
I was so high I thought there were pigeons in my room. Long story short there are now donut crumbs all around my bedroom.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
My roommate is on the phone with one of her friends trying to figure out how she threw up IN her pants. I'm not sure whether to burst out laughing or direct her towards Plan B.
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
I'll start choreographing the sperm rain dance now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey do you have any hot friends that would settle for less?
My whole house smells like Spaghetti-Os and cat litter. I think I've failed as an adult.
I think everyone, including the amish, know who you are after this weekend.
If I die write a nice eulogy and bury me with my star wars bobbleheads
Death by dick. An honorable death. Put a picture of his dick in the photo collage at my funeral.
Does it get any better than dating a guy with a vasectomy? The answer is NO. No it does not
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