he looked upset that i wasn't completely shaven. i reminded him he had begged. and beggars can't be choosers.
I couldnt decide if i wanted to pee first or vomit. So i Peed sideways while throwing up into the tub.
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
Not only do I have sand in my ass, but a crab pinched me while we were fucking. Still totally worth it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
theres a difference between trying to make someone happy and letting them fuck you in the ass
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
just had to sit in the middle of an aisle in stop and shop because we're too hungover and needed to take a break.
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
my roommate just showed me the scar on her forehead... that she got from a shake weight... That. just. happened.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I set up her keyboard so that no matter what she does, it will open up RedTube. Click and command Q all you like, its going to porn. No I play the waiting game
Shame?!? Shame only comes from getting naked in front of strangers and it not being awesome
He sent me a picture of his dick saying "your throne my lady" for my birthday. He knows the way to my heart.
i just watched a 7 minute video on people making a hot air balloon for their dog and i am a changed person
His wife just cheated on him for the third time. I'm his first extra-marital fling, that makes it ok, right? You know to keep karma balanced in the universe
Your logic is flawless...
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
Randomize