Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
i just woke up and "where the fuck is taco bell" was in my search engine...
We need to talk in the morning. The guy I was with just interpreted me taking off my earrings as code for "let me take off my pants."
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
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i just got painted green i'm not about to leave for anything
He asked me If i had cheated on my boyfriend when I said no he said it's like he doesnt know me anymore
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
She finally pulled over after almost hitting 4 cars and a semi and asked me if i was rwady i told her to let my penis to come back out
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I got kicked out of the hotel after wandering into the banquet kitchen at 2am trying to find the shrimp....so we're power napping in the car and then driving to madison.
All boys are excommunicated from my vagina until further notice.
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
Stumbled out of my bed this morning into the bathroom at 8 am still drunk, obviously. The Mormon on my floor was in the bathroom. I could practically hear her doing hail marys for me.
Its okay. I just know how you can text with your hands cuffed behind you back, so I had no idea what "oh shit" meant.
Point in my hangover when I'm honestly not sure if I'm about to puke, or shit my pants.
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