from now on my penis is your penis
you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
Judging by the amount of alcohol multiplied by the amount of her exes here, tonight will be ending in tears.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Omg! I'm gonna have a heat stroke. I'm going to collect my sweat and drink it for a buzz and hydration purposes
She told me my dick looked like a baby seal wrapped in a sleeping bag.
I gave her at least chlamydia. Maybe worse. She is also into chicks and loves taking naked pics. It's like the less I believe in Jesus, the more he rewards me.
Currently getting "blaow" buzzed into my pubes. How's your thursday?
Just sucked a bong hit straight from my girlfriends mouth & pretended I was a Dementor. Life just 87% more like HP.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Halloween is the only night where I would ever end up getting a guy's makeup all over my face
this night may include but is not limited to : police encounters, wild animals, stomach pumping, and waking up in a field
I look like a bag of dicks so if you could ugly yourself up that'd be great.
My life has evolved from screwing randos, ok?
i put frozen meatballs in my drink thinking they were ice cubes and I'm vegetarian wtf
How awkward is it to have the guy you used to sleep with congratulate you on your engagement? I'll tell you. Very.
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