it felt like I walked into a Tool Academy challenge
oh man. maybe i should puke on his dick? just to test how much he loves me?
i think i figured out where our problem might have started...when we poured more tequila on top of out margaritas to melt the ice bc they were too cold
hahaha or putting rum in the bbq sauce?
She was puking in a plastic bag while cleaning where she puked on the floor. She knows how to multitask.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ryan learned the all important lesson tonight; Red Bull gives you wings, Jaeger gives you gravity.
We're at the urgent care down the street from you if you care to stop by
Bring gay.
By that I meant the rum. I just realized that my request made no sense. You always bring gay.
If you don't let me come over I'm gonna call you on speaker and you have to listen to her scream and moan too
Got stiff armed by the garbage man on the back of the truck...I just wanted to ride one block dude
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothin ruins a fine afternoon like shitting ur pants
I'm not kidding, he literally jumped in the red panda exhibit. I knew this was gonna be a good birthday.
Okay penises are actually pretty exciting. The people attached to them are an entirely different story
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
Grandpa just whipped it out and started pissing on the way to the game stuck in traffic. I saw EVERYTHING. :(
It’s official. I’ve hooked up with all three brothers now
You should go after Dad now
I should! He’s definitely middle age fuckable
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