I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
If Jimminey Cricket were here with me he would be so disappointed.
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
Pretending to leave a voicemail when the person answers the phone....that's gotta be drunk dial level 99
My head is just one big fuzz right now.. Its like someone replaced my brain with a teddy bear
Is it inappropriate to be Drs. Willy Fister and Jess Hewill as a couples costume for Halloween?
Oh we're gynecologists
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know you're very busy with sleep and things, but when you wake up we need to talk about weirdly shaped penises.
How are you feeling?
I mean, shattered dignity aside, not bad.
I'm more heavily invested in that tequila than you are
Wait, like drink with real Phil. Or Phil, the cat that sometimes lived in your closet in Myrtle Beach?
Some guy at the bar last night bought us Arrowhead water and I was so drunk, it tasted good
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
Randomize