I just farted so loud that my cat got so scared he fell off the couch.
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
I ate one of your animal crackers. just one. ok four. but no frosting. ok frosting.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hid my booze in my old Sesame Street lunch box. Big Bird might be disappointed, but I feel Oscar the Grouch would approve.
if your not going to answer your phone this is just going to be an embarrassment tomorrow
I wanna die of smoke inhalation. In a huge teepee. Or one of those big things kids in kindergarten have that you throw up in the air then sit inside of.
Well that's the first time I've woken up with wet jorts
Thanks for the viagra you gave me last night. I ended up getting called in to work to cover a shift. So I had to tell Kayla that I couldn't hang out and I had to try and hide my dick all night while walking serving people food all night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude I bought a 300 dollar buffalo painting. I'm no longer allowed to take shrooms.
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
She told me I was absolutely not allowed to sleep with him even though she knows I'm a rule breaker who loves a good challenge.
Like pizza and mermaids make up about 1/3 of my thoughts on the weekends.
Dad literally changed the channel from an episode of Big Bang Theory to another episode of Big Bang Theory. That's why I hate this show.
Yeah, we got drunk and stole road signs.
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