and then I told him he looked like the Gordon's Fisherman dude. I don't think he thought it was funny, because he 'forgot' to pay for my beer.
I think my goal in life now is to be a Trending topic on Twitter after I die.
The woman in front of me has a completely clear purse. I can see everything. It's ballsy because her vagisil is on display.
I told my mom I had sex with him and even SHE was proud. Now that's saying something.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I'm getting too used to throwing up in the reception trash can. It doesn't even phase me anymore
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
My dad is so drunk he attempted to ride my two year old cousin's tricycle. For a solid five minutes.
You burned the hair off your arms. Again.
It grows back stronger each time.
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's been watching the World Cup too much because right before he came he screamed "NUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" for half a minute. Our landlord is not happy.
She posted a pic of her bf on ig wishing him a happy bday at midnight. She then proceeded to have sex with me. Who is the bday boy again?
But he's super into Jesus and I'm the devil. So we weren't meant to be
bitch dont make me pour hotsauce in your vagina
I can't believe it is only 1:30...I may have to stab myself with scissors for an excuse to go home...
I feel like it's the kind of place that would appriciate my Aladdin vest
Randomize