bobby jindal makes me wanna cover my ears. you make me wanna smile.
Fun fact: he pulled out my nuva ring while he was fingering me.. he looked really confused at me and it a couple of times, so i just said "surprise! not only is it good for pleasure, it's also really handy for storing plastic toys." I'm thinking he's definately gonna call.
Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
He told me to fart on his lap because the vibrations turned him on
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Signed everyone in my dorm up for free samples of astroglyde. Took me an hour. Happy new years!!!!!
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
There are 144 bottles of wine in my mother's pantry. She just shrugged her shoulders and said it was for the wine pong tournament on Christmas Day.
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
Finally washing the shoe scuff marks off my front windshield :( bye bye memories
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
Why is your solution always to masturbate
Because it usually works
This town is a penis wasteland. I haven't seen a suitable penis in months. This is becoming an emergency situation. I need penis in my life
these past three weeks have been a real "fuck you" to my liver
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