im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
she just uttered the sweetest sentence in the english language...my stripper friends are coming over
Just lifeguarded a kid's party hungover so I could afford to go out drinking tonight. Circle of life shit goin on here.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just spent 10 min explaining to my mom how orange is a strange color. I think she knows
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
So the bartender tried kicking me out but i screamed im an RA you cant kick me out
The highlight of the night was when he yelled "WAS THIS CONDOM MADE FOR TODDLERS??"
Don't be too mad at the guy who broke your kitchen table. Didn't get his name, but he knew all about your gay porn career. Like DETAILS...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
had a dream you helped me fill my shoes with yogurt. we were even like "why didn't we think of this before?!" like it was just so obvious
that sounds like something we'd do... we're onto something here
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
Not sure who they are or where we're going but they just bought me 3 tacos so I'm staying.
but next to his bed he has a bible, and on the bible he has a pbr coaster and a condom. how can i stay mad at that? Its amazing.
I just tried to dye my pubic hair teal for her
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
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