I think I just got seasick
you're not on a boat
he has a waterbed.
Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
I have a voicemail from Mike at 1am. He starts to say something, but then throws up instead.
Does transporting jello shots count as driving with an open container?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he conducted the entire waffle house into singing the song Oklahoma. He was wasted.
She told me I should be a condom model.
Someone tried to flush pizza down the toilet. Well, at least tried to
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
I'm auditing financial statements and ur growing weed this is bullshit how did this happen to me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Walk of shame dressed as a Christmas tree, it happened. Ho ho ho bitches
I wonder how your parents would feel if the scarf they gave me for Christmas is mainly being used for a blindfold during sex...
Yo this huge scar on my head from the car accident is truly a vag magnet. Probably because I'm telling people I was attacked by a mountain lion and killed it with my bare hands. But hey when life gives you lemons, you use them to get pussy
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
He grabbed my tits and sang "you are so beautiful" to them before faceplanting into my chest
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