yo im tryna cop a beej tonight
I think the recipie for awesome sauce is butter and semen
he obviously didn't care that i was sleeping and dreaming about ellen degeneres knitting me a christmas sweater.
all i wanted to do was something grown up. like go to applebees and drink.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
yeah i didn't know anyone, but i just walked in with a lit sparkler and wearing a budweiser shirt and someone handed me a beer.
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
My neighbour is taking her hamster for a walk on a leash. Come over now
It's funny when you can't take a fishing boat because you fucked the captains wife
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean, it was a fun hookup and he's cute and whatnot, but he wouldn't go down on me. Plus he's a republican. Idk why but those things feel like they go hand in hand.
Well if I can't snuggle you, I might as well snuggle a stranger's cat.
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
I woke up on the floor with 2 cartons of cigarettes, a box of chocolate bars, and a business card for a man named Larry. Don't remember him, but if the Rols on his card is his, I might throw him a mouth party...
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
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