I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
My mom just drunkenly told me i was conceived in the back of a car, at a Bon Jovi concert.
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
I am compiling a playlist that reminds me of all my best sexual encounters. It shall be called THE MUSIC OF MY VAGINA'S PEOPLE
I don't see how I managed to fuck up so much shit in an hour and a half..
Nothing says besties like laying naked in bed hungover arguing over who is getting the pants
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
me + whiskey = a bad person
I can't take my grandparents out somewhere where I've fucked half the staff.
Just spent 10 minutes washing away my own puke. This gas station lady loves me.
all i remember is slapping you in the face with a slice of pizza while laughing maniacally.
I'll meet you in hell with unlimited boxes of wine though
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