Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
Lets go to the mall and pick up some fat chicks and take them out tonight so we can be the skinny friends
So i just got diagnosed with swine flu. im at walgreens looking like shit and this guy keeps staring at me. Im so gonna cough in his face.
well, dont
I didnt. i just coughed then looked at him menacingly. he got it.
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
what is the protocol for being hungover enough to vomit in a potted plant during my botany lecture?
I ate goldfish off your shoulder, I think we had bigger issues
Sometimes I think I have so much sex with you to be sure you're actually straight.
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Some days you just pee in a stairwell and go home.
I got another blow job proposal last night. Skills.
Is there a classy way to tell him that to thank him for his service I would like to put his dick in my mouth?
"Happy Veterans Day! Now pull down your pants."
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
It's slightly odd going to a booty call during morning rush hour with everyone else going to work.
Randomize