You're completely useless in the revolution.
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
Last night you were talking while puking saying, "ahh the shoes and the purse, I'm gonna have to wash those"
It was all going great until he pulled the hamburger meat out of his pocket
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wake up, take the dog to the trails, puke in the woods. More days should start like this.
Well that's another check off the sexual bucketlist of things I never wanted to experience.
You looked at my sister and yelled at her saying in a couple of years she will be yours
I just want to hug my vagina but I can't!\nLike, I want to wrap my arms around it and say "I'm sorry"
Stop leaving me alone with my ex boyfriends after keg challenges. Woke up in his bed covered in what you think would be cum. No...toothpaste. He left a note. "Be home at four. Don't be here when I get back."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WHEN THE FUCK DID MCDONALD'S DECIDE TO QUIT SERVING BURGERS AT 1:00AM?
I would peed on everything
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
You told us that you were going to become a 'new man' and threw your tv set out of a window.
Why does everyone always assume I'm fucking their boyfriends?
You are fucking her boyfriend.
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
Randomize