I found the seven page love letter I had written you. I'm sorry i was so obsessed.
hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
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Andrew is trying to convince me that i took your virginity. Please tell me he is lying.
define virginity.
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
He just walked in our room casually and said "big girls are hungry"
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
No, not at all. Pulling a condom out of your vag at 2pm is NOTHING like finding $10 in your winter coat. Stop trying to make me feel better.
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I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
The only alcohol in the house was a bottle of Sherry. It's like cough syrup that I shotgunned off Strawberry Shortcake's ass.
How much do you charge for your Funyun and beer delivery service?
You don't understand. My ass is the color of eggplant.
So, looks like I managed to leave my bra in the boardroom after all the sex. FML.
I am going to bedazzle the shit out of your Basilisk costume.
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