all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
hes so high that he's convinced hes a duck. hes squating in the bathtub quacking. that was NOT JUST pot.
I'm sitting in my bathroom sink, eating a tuna sandwich. He had better weed than I expected.
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
Spotted: woman loading franzia into a toddler-sized shopping cart for her child to push. Beautiful.
One minute we were getting noise complainted by the security guards the next I was shotgunning a beer with them
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
I know how I'm going to make my fortune.. designing an icepack made specifically for the vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Imagine Captain Hook, but in penis form and sometimes shy.
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
FUCK and YOU. times 10. To infinity and beyond. You bastard. Worst. Cockblock. Ever. I'm going to nail your sister.
FYI telling a guy that you're glad his dick isn't big after giving him a bj, is NOT a compliment.
I think every girl deserves a pregnancy scare. Because then it just feels like such a priviledge to be bleeding out of the vagina.
I legit just did a jig towards my box of tampons.
so this hot guy who looks like brad pitt circa troy era in my physics lab is staring at me right now and it's taking all the willpower I have not to procreate with him right now.
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