I'll let you put expensive food in me, but really, not much else.
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
That taco smell coming from your belly button was a huge turnoff
the amount of times i have wished for a boxed wine emoticon is almost alarming. almosttt
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I'm going to postpone my photo shoot until my Gpa dies. I don't want to be in lingerie and stripper heels when I finally get the call
Results of pregaming honors college basketball social: 18 points, 3 blocks, and 3 flagrant fouls leading to 2 broken bones on former valedictorians. I'm doing this more often.
If drinking before honors events and injuring our universities brightest doesn't get you kicked out of the program, you're not trying hard enough.
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
Front seat of an Escalade in a limo-service parking lot. That is all.
Fucking someone because they own a lava lamp is like fucking someone because they have 20 dollars and no concern for their house burning down.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
I'm just gonna eat nachos and wine fruit forever.
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
just saw those girls we met the other night. i happen to be wearing a bunny suit and driving your smart car. i think its safe to say thats a no go situation.
I'm currently drunk proofing my room
Our orgasm ration was 1:45. No. Fucking. Joke. I thought I was going to die.
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