My feet smell like cheese. Makes me hungry.
So I'm eating my burger minding my own business, when the guy next to me starts up a conversation. Seemed normal at first, stocks, bonds, etc...then he said...and I quote "I can push a bowling-ball up a flight of stairs with my tongue." As I awkwardly laughed he broke out "I bet you I could bite the head off of a rabbit."
oh right, i forgot that not everyone has a go-to blowjob
That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
Ethically speaking on a scale from 1 to morally wrong, how wrong would it be to give babies ambien? Hypothetically speaking.
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
Dude. Steinbecking. It's when you double-fist coffee and alcohol to help you meet a writing deadline.
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
I mean, he's 40, foreign, artsy but with substance abuse problems and estranged children. How is he not my type?
It's only ok to pee out the window in the afternoon when you're drunk.
So I "accidentally" brought my road beers into church for this wedding
And they fell out of my pocket on the pew. Made quite a noise...safe to say I'm batting a thousand
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