another moral hangover. fuck.
This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
my tits taste like a pina colada. how often do you get to say that?
Remind them to make the "above the influence" commercial about us fallin off a ferris wheel
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
As soon as he told me I had a 'pretty laugh' I knew I'd be putting out more than I had originally planned.
My vagina has become a graveyard for my brother's friendships...
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
guess who's bored in chemistry researching how to sneak weed through airport security in her vagina?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was dressed as ron burgundy and his pickup line was "dont worry, i wont make you jump in a bear pit."
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
one of my coworkers wanted to look something up on YouTube on my tablet. I didn't know how to explain why my most recent search was "girl fucks dog."
What is your life?
A tangled mess of finals and bad decisions.
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
Randomize