I just woke up in bed next to my teacher. Does that mean I'm passing now?
cynthia nixon should never get laid more than me
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
Okay, guy from work I want to fuck just told me he liked the font on my PowerPoint presentation. It is so on.
Make me proud, climb that corporate ladder.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
I just want to let you know how hung over I am today and I fucked a girl in a kangaroo costume last night.
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Okay, yeah, judgmental guy at 7/11. I'm buying g wine at 10:20 in the morning. You wanna fight about it?
Noo not in a booty call way, in a 'How are your abs and penis doing today?' sort of way.
I just did a bump with my mom so I’d sober up for Black Friday shopping
I just found three upside down bottles of grapejuice in a triangle around the air freshener above my toilet... I guess it was one of those nights
Ever been to a strip club with one stripper? I have. And she sucked.
So, I'm roughly 90% sure that the guy next to me in the xray waiting room is watching porn on his phone right now
Randomize