Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
getting your period on valentines day is like an extra little fuck you, now you REALLY have no chance of sex tonight.
How do I invite him to our 4th of July cookout without sounding too much like "hey you were my first orgasm and I want your dick inside my while watching fireworks"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
all you kept saying from the spare room was "can you bring me a puke bowl...and the cat"
She woke up with blood running down her face and asked the EMS guy where the keg was
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
My only objective is to get drunk enough to forget the last 364 days.
I was high fiving everyone. I even high fived with the wall for doing such a good job suporting the ceiling and keeping us alive.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Brandon just showed up at my place with a florida state cheerleader he met in vegas durin spring break. His life is a fucking movie
I think you'll be amused to know that I achieved the impossible feat of tripping over my own dick
He has a burner phone just to send dick pics. It's revolutionary
Drunk me really does appreciate that sober me made a list of movies to watch when drunk it saves so much time
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
Forget work, lets run away, rob banks, and have kinky sex with fuzzy handcuffs.
IT'S LIKE YOU READ MY MIND.
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