She told me at midnight she would blow me harder than a new years party kazoo
standing in line at subway, they've got 'stand up and get crunk' blaring. the lines out the door and everyone is dancing. Lombardi Gras rules.
I didn't think I could chip a tooth while giving a blowjob until I met him.
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
Breathalizer & tazer party did not go as casually as expected.
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll just put on a bunch of mascara and cry right before I get there. Then everyone will recognize me.
Opening beer with my teeth is getting easier the drunker I become.
It turns out my teeth are bleeding.
Fell asleep with Kristen and woke up with Sarah. It's official, vacation has begun.
So his dick was definitely bigger than it looked in all the pictures he sent my daughter.
I have no idea, I usually just project my awkwardness out like a mating call until it draws other awkward members of the opposite sex out from the bushes
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
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